Bless My Heart

the improvement of a southern girl

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Happy Trees + the Machine

Sometimes I wish for falling, wish for the release
Wish for falling through the air to give me some relief
Because falling’s not the problem, when I’m falling I’m at peace
It’s only when I hit the ground it causes all the grief

A beautiful song. Simple melody and simple lyrics that make perfect sense. Life is exciting and fun and gentle and spiritual – and then it is not. Very suddenly.

I posted this on my Facebook the other night, and then deleted it. I really don’t want to look like a pathetic fool to the two hundred or so people that are my “friends” that have no idea who I am. I wanted it to be seen by those people who GET me. There are a few out there, and I appreciate them immensely. So here I am. Posting on my blog. And then posted my blog on Facebook so people would actually see it. Subscribe so I don’t have to FB, will ya?

I keep wanting this blog to bounce back into a happy world. One with happy trees and happy clouds and Bob Ross. I grew up watching him because my mom watched him on Saturday mornings (no, we didn’t watch cartoons on Saturday, we watched PBS). I didn’t realize how very cool that man really was.

But the blog can’t bounce back into Happy Land. Because fictional Happy Land doesn’t freaking exist. This is the Real World, baby. And I mean “baby” in that “don’t be a sissy” sort of way. Ole’ Bob up there was in the military before he painted happy trees. Bob Ross could have probably kicked all of our asses at some point in time. I think Bob is really Chuck Norris.

Wow. I just put that together and it is kinda scary.

Anyway. Bob earned his trees. Now I’m earning mine.

Jeez. I just started writing out all the things that have happened in the last 12 months, and I got pissed off at myself and erased it all. Something big and new has happened this past week, but I’m keeping that story for another time. That’s the point of this whole post… EVERYONE HAS THEIR BATTLES. I’m not special because of the events that have happened to me. Yes, I have shared some of them. I also have kept some silent. You know about some. You don’t know about others. Does it matter one way or the other? No. It doesn’t affect much at all.

Just like it doesn’t matter much if I know all of your business or not. I might stalk some people online. I may read what they have to say. That doesn’t necessarily mean that I CARE about any of it. It means I’m bored, usually.

I don’t know, though. It’s also nice to know someone has walked the same trail as you. So maybe I’m disagreeing with myself a little here. It’s all well and good to

, but it’s also really, really comforting to know that people just like you have walked the very same path.

To know that no matter what has happened to you; the heartbreak, the hurting, the disappointment, the betrayal, the pain… it has all happened before. You are not the first. I am not the first. I will not be the last. You will not be the last. Someone has been there before you. Someone will be there after you.

The difference is not what road you take. We all take the same road. The difference is if you keep your eyes on the ground, looking at all the rocks and broken tree limbs that make the travel difficult, or if you have your eyes on the horizon.

The horizon in which the sun sets every single day.

The horizon in which the sun rises again. Every single day.

Encourage one another.



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Ah. That feels better.

I no longer feel like a turd; life may continue on as normal now. Check out my workouts page to see what I’ve been sweating for.

I want to take a second to thank you all that have giving me an encouraging word through the short lifespan of this blog. I cannot tell you how many times a little nudge of encouragement has helped me get through my struggles. I will try to do my best to “pay it forward” whenever possible. You never know who’s day you could make with just a simple smile, “thank you”, or “you can do it!”. I know I appreciate any and all comments that I get on here! (hint, hint)

I’m taking it easy this evening and going to drool over Don Draper with The Man. Well, he’s not going to drool over Don, but I’m sure he doesn’t mind all the chicks in Mad Men, either.

Oh. My. God.